ENGLISH SUCKS

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ENGLISH SUCKS
« on: May 17, 2011, 09:30:28 AM » by ECA

http://www.sheetr.com/21-reasons-why-english-sucks/

21 Reasons why English Sucks
Posted on August 6, 2008 by Bob

1. The bandage was wound around the wound.

2. The farm was used to produce produce.

3. The dump was so full it had to refuse more refuse.

4. We must polish the Polish furniture.

5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7. Since there was no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10. I did not object to the object.

11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12. There was a row among the oarsmen on how to row.

13. They were too close to the door to close it.

14. The buck does funny things when does are present.

15. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17. The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

18. After a number of injections my jaw got number.

19. Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

20. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

21. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

*22. Catch up on your favorite TV Series online on my other site

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If all the world is a stage, I am the target of tomatoes and fresh fruit.
Hemorrhoids Unite, the first arsehole to raise his hand is president.

Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #1 on: May 17, 2011, 10:03:28 AM » by bobbo

Regarding Item #22--I can't find the link to tv shows. Is it there?

Regarding the Most Populous cities--it would be nice to side rank them according to density as well. It struck me that China came in so low in the list and while Tokyo is by far the most populous, it is also very large. Where is the "most dense" definable area? Easy to think Hong Kong or some other place that is all skyscrapers?

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Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #2 on: May 17, 2011, 03:10:31 PM » by Misanthropic Scott

Time flies like an arrow.
Fruit flies like a banana.

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Whatever your cause, it’s a lost cause without population control. -- Paul Ehrlich

I refuse to believe corporations are people until Texas executes one. -- from moveon.org.

Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #3 on: May 17, 2011, 05:03:51 PM » by ECA

TV CHANNEL LINK..
http://wme.tv/forum.php

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If all the world is a stage, I am the target of tomatoes and fresh fruit.
Hemorrhoids Unite, the first arsehole to raise his hand is president.

Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #4 on: May 17, 2011, 05:19:41 PM » by bobbo

ECA--lots of good shows there==thanks. Sure would prefer "full screen."

Scot==great couplet there.

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Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #5 on: May 19, 2011, 08:47:44 AM » by Obtuser

A couple of observations:
-English, with all its inconsistencies, is one of the youngest languages to have evolved
-Latin is used universally for precision in Science and Medicine since it is a "dead" language that does not change or evolve over time

English is used World Wide for Aviation command and control. It is not by accident that this happened, but probably because most of the early aviation was in the English speaking world, plus it is one of the most trite discourses. Like it or hate it, this "conversation/communication code" will be with us for a very long time!

And speaking of Eskimo / Inuit, they demonstrate a very high degree of "learning it once the correct way" but by a one on one method. Their survival for eons has depended on it. It is an example of survival of the fittest. This trait was discovered during WW2 in the Cdn. Arctic when the RCAF needed aviation mechanics for the aircraft used to fly men and materiel in and Pitch Blende Ore out of Great Bear Lake for the Manhattan Project thus the Atomic Bomb was born.

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What are you worrying for? You are not getting out of this life alive, dead don't hurt, getting there might, and in some cases, damn well should!
Plus during and after the next Ice Age, all of this infrastructure around us won't matter squat!

Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #6 on: May 19, 2011, 10:07:41 AM » by bobbo

Obtuser--all cultures "depend" on their language for survival. All language is transmitted one to one within the family and then larger than family after that. Can you expand on what makes the Eskimo language unique? You seem to say it is more accurate than other languages in some manner? I haven't heard what you are referring to.

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Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #7 on: May 19, 2011, 12:19:34 PM » by Obtuser

: bobbo May 19, 2011, 10:07:41 AM

Obtuser--all cultures "depend" on their language for survival. All language is transmitted one to one within the family and then larger than family after that. Can you expand on what makes the Eskimo language unique? You seem to say it is more accurate than other languages in some manner? I haven't heard what you are referring to.

The message was in the medium. Inuit learn exceptionally well, but on a one to one basis of student with teacher. Their skill is not in the language, but in their nature/temperament. In that harsh climate, you learn the lessons correctly or you don't survive, and sometimes not even then. Their ability to be shown a task once correctly and get it right the first and every time there after is legendary! Likewise this is also indicative of their memory skills. this includes memories of the folk lore passed down from generation to generation!
But this does not necessarily translate to other elements of human interaction. Critical thinking, especially self criticism is another skill set which includes some useful degree of paranoia [not to the degree of debilitation and or inability to make decisions / take actions!]
Do not assume that i am an expert on anything Inuit. But I do know one other thing. If you are to ever visit/live with these survivors of the Great White North, DO NOT switch to their diet. Cook your food, because they can digest the raw liver so rich in Vitamin D that you would be poisoned. One of my acquaintances had to medivacced out of the Cdn. Arctic then have his intestines partly removed due to ulceration. Raw Polar Bear Liver is a delicacy to Inuit, but could kill you!

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Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #8 on: May 19, 2011, 03:15:04 PM » by bobbo

Obtuser--hmmm==are Eskimos unique by culture as imposed by environment? One of the first postulates of linquistics is that every language is sufficient for its own needs. Eskimos have more words for snow than do Kalihara bushmen because they have more need for them. Is the Eskimo unique or only sufficient for their own needs? Does a Kalihara bushman, or a Bedouin Camel driver also not die if they don't follow the rules for safe water?

You may be right in the fine point you are making--I believe all people are the same yet different at the same time. We are the same in that we learn the language of our home, we are different in that that language is different around the world. The same and different at the same time. Does this use of language make one a type of savant when following directions? Maybe so. Thanks.

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Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #9 on: May 20, 2011, 06:28:35 PM » by Misanthropic Scott

: bobbo May 17, 2011, 05:19:41 PM

Scot [sic]==great couplet there.

Thanks. It's not original though, so no credit to me. I will accept cash though ...

[OK, a coupon good for two (2) embedded videos (excluding porn, rap music or religious telecasts not including the shaman's on-screen death -- KD]

« Last Edit: May 23, 2011, 12:46:33 AM by KD Martin »
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Whatever your cause, it’s a lost cause without population control. -- Paul Ehrlich

I refuse to believe corporations are people until Texas executes one. -- from moveon.org.

Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #10 on: May 23, 2011, 02:26:39 PM » by bobbo

I never knew there were "Pun-offs" but obviously many people treasure the complexity of the English language. I wouldn't take it as far as they do, too heavy.

http://hereandnow.wbur.org/2011/05/23/pun-word-play

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Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #11 on: May 23, 2011, 05:43:21 PM » by Obtuser

Pun-off, wasn't he a Russian comedienne?

The authoritative source on puns has to be Bennet Cerf, who wrote, collected and published a book called "Punishment"!

http://www.punoftheday.com/bennet-cerf.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bennett_Cerf

I did have a copy of it, but cannot locate it at this moment! [It is not listed on eBay at this time]

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Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #12 on: May 24, 2011, 07:05:35 AM » by Obtuser

: bobbo May 19, 2011, 10:07:41 AM

Obtuser--all cultures "depend" on their language for survival. All language is transmitted one to one within the family and then larger than family after that. Can you expand on what makes the Eskimo language unique? You seem to say it is more accurate than other languages in some manner? I haven't heard what you are referring to.

It not that the Inuit/Eskimo languages are more precise, but rather that their ability to learn any given task or lesson the first time correctly is a reflection of the more intense rule of survival of the fittest is more obvious/evident. I have only experienced one day of Winter at -52 F. out of many that were in the low forties, and that was as a teenager walking to and from High School. While I have an exceptional memory for the unusual and weird, I don't need to have repeat episodes to remind me that survival in the Great White North is by dressing warmest, plus keeping hydrated/well fed! At those temperatures, alcohol is a quick killer, too!
Another point, those Natives who were taught how to do aviation maintenance during WW2 on the North Shore of Great Bear Lake were taught in English, not Inuktitut! Comprenez vous?

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Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #13 on: May 25, 2011, 09:17:28 AM » by Misanthropic Scott

: Obtuser May 24, 2011, 07:05:35 AM

: bobbo May 19, 2011, 10:07:41 AM
Obtuser--all cultures "depend" on their language for survival. All language is transmitted one to one within the family and then larger than family after that. Can you expand on what makes the Eskimo language unique? You seem to say it is more accurate than other languages in some manner? I haven't heard what you are referring to.
It not that the Inuit/Eskimo languages are more precise, but rather that their ability to learn any given task or lesson the first time correctly is a reflection of the more intense rule of survival of the fittest is more obvious/evident. I have only experienced one day of Winter at -52 F. out of many that were in the low forties, and that was as a teenager walking to and from High School. While I have an exceptional memory for the unusual and weird, I don't need to have repeat episodes to remind me that survival in the Great White North is by dressing warmest, plus keeping hydrated/well fed! At those temperatures, alcohol is a quick killer, too!
Another point, those Natives who were taught how to do aviation maintenance during WW2 on the North Shore of Great Bear Lake were taught in English, not Inuktitut! Comprenez vous?

While in the high arctic near Pond Inlet (on an ice floe) and hoping to see polar bears, I asked if the guides spoke Nanuktitut. I thought it would be more useful for finding Nanuk to speak his language. Perhaps it would also be better as a language for surviving extremely cold temperatures.

From British co-travelers on a different trip (to Churchill):

Baby Bear: Mummy. Am I a polar bear.
Mama Bear: Yes dear. You are a polar bear.
BB: Mummy. Am I really a polar bear.
MB: Yes dear! You are really a polar bear.
BB: Mummy. Am I really and truly a polar bear.
MB: Yes dear! You are really and truly a polar bear. Why do you keep asking that?
BB: 'Cause I'm bloody cold!

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Whatever your cause, it’s a lost cause without population control. -- Paul Ehrlich

I refuse to believe corporations are people until Texas executes one. -- from moveon.org.

Re: ENGLISH SUCKS
« Reply #14 on: May 28, 2011, 09:36:53 AM » by Obtuser

: Obtuser May 23, 2011, 05:43:21 PM

Pun-off, wasn't he a Russian comedienne?

The authoritative source on puns has to be Bennet Cerf, who wrote, collected and published a book called "Punishment"!

http://www.punoftheday.com/bennet-cerf.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bennett_Cerf

I did have a copy of it, but cannot locate it at this moment! [It is not listed on eBay at this time]

OK, since no one caught it, I will apologize and correct the statement! "Punishment" was written by Harvey C. Gordon and published by Punster's Press of Glenview, Ill., not Bennet Cerf! And Bennet Cerf did write a "Treasury of Atrocious Puns", and published by Harper and Row, New York, N.Y. Both books will keep you amused for hours!
[Bennet Cerf was a famous publisher in his own right, too. Random House: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bennett_Cerf]
Now you know part of the rest of the story, I am not related to Paul Harvey. Goood Daaay, eh!
[and yes, my voice is a close imitation of Paul Harvey's naturally!]
Both books will keep you amused for hours!

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